


Right Kind of Wrong

by CitrusVanille



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Abandoned Work - Unfinished and Discontinued, Age Difference, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Student/Teacher, M/M, Marauders' Era, Teacher-Student Relationship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2006-05-24
Updated: 2007-08-12
Packaged: 2018-04-25 02:00:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 10
Words: 19,163
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4942360
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CitrusVanille/pseuds/CitrusVanille
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU. Sirius Black meets a young professor in Paris the summer before his last year at Hogwarts. What happens when he meets the man again at school?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Remus is older than the other three Marauders, and did not go to Hogwarts.
> 
> The song "Right Kind of Wrong" is by LeAnn Rimes.
> 
> This work is incomplete and discontinued.

_“I… I have to go,” the seventeen-year-old boy twined two of his fingers in his shoulder-length black hair, refusing to meet his companion’s amber eyes. “We’re leaving Paris tomorrow… going home.”_

_“I see.” The brunet’s reply was soft, his amber eyes guarded. Not quite twenty, he was shorter and slighter than the grey-eyed youth still playing with his black locks, but his eyes told of a maturity far beyond his years._

_“I’m sorry…” the younger boy started._

_“Don’t be,” was the short response._

_“I don’t want to go!” the grey-eyed boy suddenly burst out, almost violently, looking up into his companion’s face. “I want to stay here, with you!”_

_“Stop it, Sirius,” the brunet snapped. “We knew from the beginning that this couldn’t go beyond the summer. Summer’s over, now. We have to be over, too.”_

_“Don’t say that!” Sirius grabbed the older man’s wrists. “_ Please _!”_

_“Sirius, we knew – ”_

_“Come back to England with me!” Sirius cut him off._

_“What?” amber eyes widened._

_“Come back to England, Remus,” Sirius begged. “You said yourself you’ve wanted to go back for years. Now you have a reason!”_

_“I can’t just up and leave, Sirius. My life is here. My job. My friends. I grew up here, this is my home.”_

_“You had a home in London once,” Sirius reminded him. “You told me you lived there before you came to France to go to school.”_

_“But I don’t have a home there anymore.”_

_“We can make a home together!” Sirius insisted._

_“Sirius, you’re too young…”_

_“I’ll be eighteen this year!” the younger man protested._

_“Your parents would never let you go, whether you’re of age or not.”_

_“To hell with my parents!”_

_“Don’t say that, Sirius.”_

_“Why not?” the black-haired boy demanded. “They don’t give a shit about me. They never have. I can’t keep what I am a secret from them forever. They’ll figure it out eventually, when they want me to marry some girl, and I won’t do it. They’ll kick me out. They’ll never want to see me again. Why can’t I leave on my own terms? Why can’t I be with you?”_

_“You don’t really know me, Sirius,” the brunet told him. “I don’t really know you. We’ve only had the summer. That’s all this was ever supposed to be.”_

_“But I want to know you!”_

_“There are some things you can’t know!” Remus burst out, then subsided, looking upset by his uncharacteristic outburst._

_“What things?” Sirius insisted. “I want to know! Is something wrong? Are you sick? Did something happen? Tell me!”_

_“This has to end, Sirius.” Remus pulled his hands away abruptly, not answering Sirius’s questions, and stood, pacing away from the bed, where the younger boy still sat, towards the window overlooking the Seine._

_Sirius bit his lip. Remus’s tone brooked no arguments; he had made up his mind._ All or nothing, _Sirius thought._ I’ll never get another chance. _“I love you, Rem,” he whispered._

_Remus’s back stiffened as he inhaled sharply, and his hands clenched convulsively into fists._

_Sirius watched him, holding his breath, waiting for the brunet to say something… anything._

_Seconds of silence ticked by. They felt like years._

_Sirius’s heart felt like it was being crushed in a vice. His eyes prickled, and he blinked rapidly to relieve the sting, refusing to give in to the rising desire to cry. He swallowed hard. It was over. “Can we at least have one last night together?” he asked, angry at the choked sound of his voice._

_Remus turned after a long moment. His face was tight, eyes unnaturally bright and filled with pain. His lower lip was bright red, as though he’d been biting it hard. “One last night,” he whispered. He took a step forward, then another. “One last night,” he said again._

_And then Sirius was wrapped tightly in Remus’s arms as the older man pressed their mouths together with almost bruising force. Sirius fell back against the mattress, the smaller man on top of him. He wound his arms around the other’s body, and was surprised to feel the slighter man was shaking._

_Sirius pulled his mouth away, gasping for breath. “Rem, are you – ” he tried to ask, but he was silenced by a fierce kiss._

_“Don’t talk,” Remus whispered, pulling away and trailing kissing down the tan skin of Sirius’s throat. He kissed the sensitive spot at the crook of Sirius’s neck, then placed another kiss just behind one ear. “Just show me goodbye,” he breathed into the younger man’s ear._

_Slender fingers began expertly undoing the buttons of Sirius’s shirt, and the dark-haired boy moaned into the mouth that once more covered his own…_

 

– – – – –

“ – don’t get up right now you’re going to have to go without a shower!” James Potter’s loud voice accompanied the vicious pillow that had knocked Sirius awake.

“Nng,” Sirius groaned, rolling over and batting the unrelenting pillow away from his head.

“Are you awake?” James’s voice demanded.

Sirius cracked one eye open.

The messy-haired boy standing over him, pillow raised, was eyeing him ominously.

Sirius groaned again and opened both eyes properly. “I’m awake,” he muttered.

“Good.” James thwacked the grey-eyed boy once more with the pillow, then headed for his trunk to get dressed.

Sirius groaned a third time, and rolled out of bed, stumbling towards the bathroom to wash up.

He’d been back in England for over a week, and he couldn’t get Remus out of his head. He’d dreamt of the other man every night since his return, and even his return to Hogwarts the night before hadn’t changed anything. It seemed he could dream about the brunet just as well in a dorm room as in his own room at home.

It had been a whirlwind affair.

Sirius had gone to Paris for the summer with his family, and had met Remus Lupin his second day abroad. They’d run into each other in the street – literally – that rainy afternoon, and Sirius had insisted on treating the other man to lunch at a nearby café to apologize for the croissant he’d made the brunet drop in a puddle. They had started talking, and gone for a walk around the city. They’d gotten so distracted, dinnertime had come and gone before they even realized it was getting dark.

They’d met the next day at the same café, and again the day after that. Five days later, they were sitting on a secluded bench in a park, and Sirius had boldly leaned in and kissed the other man on the mouth. After a stunned moment – in which time Sirius had thoroughly cursed himself out before beginning to panic – Remus had kissed him back.

Things had progressed rapidly, and by the end of Sirius’s second week in Paris, he was sleeping in Remus’s apartment most nights, and spending nearly all of his time in the other man’s company. As long as he was home to eat brunch with his parents (breakfast for them, and the only time they were ever around), they didn’t care what he did, or notice where he went. Regulus was too caught up in his own life to care what his older brother did, so no one questioned where Sirius disappeared to.

Both men had known from the beginning that it was only a summer fling, and neither had made any mention of wanting anything more. Remus was working as a researcher for some library (he had never said which one), and was hoping to get a job teaching someday. Sirius was still in school (though only for one more year), and had to return to England with his family at the end of the summer. Remus, though born in London, seemed content in Paris, and happy with his job. Sirius… well, Sirius had his life in England, just as Remus had his in France. And he had known from the beginning that, no matter how attracted to the other man he was, it could never be anything serious, because how awful would it be to have to keep the fact that he was a wizard a secret? It had been hard enough to keep quiet about it for the two months they’d been together, but how impossible would it be if he had to keep it hidden his entire life?

But as the days had turned into weeks, Sirius had become more and more attached to the older man. In the short time they’d been together, Remus had become as close to him as James in many ways – and obviously closer in others. Despite the fact that Sirius had needed to keep much of his life secret, he’d found he could just _talk_ to Remus, and not have to worry about sounding stupid. He’d begun to wonder if, maybe, just maybe, they could have a real relationship.

The more he’d thought about it, the more reasonable it sounded. After all, he was good at keeping secrets. No one but James knew of Sirius’s orientation, not even Peter, who was supposed to be the third musketeer. Remus, obviously, knew Sirius’s preferences, so it wouldn’t be as though Sirius had to keep _more_ secrets, he was just keeping different secrets from different people.

Perhaps, Sirius had mused on more than one occasion, if things worked out between them, he might even be able to tell Remus the truth one day. It wasn’t as though mixed couples were rare. Why, his own cousin had recently married a Muggle… of course, she had been immediately disowned, but that was just because the Black family was bigoted and cared more for the purity of its name and bloodlines than for the people who carried that blood. Anyway, Sirius reasoned, he was sure to have his name burnt off the family tree as soon as it was discovered that he fancied men, not women, so it didn’t particularly matter if the man happened to be a Muggle as well.

Despite all his cogitations, however, Sirius hadn’t quite accepted the depth of his feelings until August was nearly half over. By that time, it was impossible to deny the fact that he had fallen – hard.

He hadn’t had the courage to say anything to Remus, though, until that last night. And Remus had shot him down. Maybe if he’d said something sooner, if he’d had more time, he could have convinced the beautiful brunet that what they had together was worth saving. That what they had together was worth a real chance, not just a summer fling.

Their last night together had been… amazing. There were no words.

And now, he was dreaming about it every time he closed his eyes. Silky brown hair picked out with red and gold highlights when the sun hit it just right; incredible amber eyes that practically glowed when he truly smiled; soft, pale skin that heated at Sirius’s lightest touch…

“Are you almost done in there?” James’s voice floated through the heavy door.

Sirius jumped, startled. He’d forgotten he was supposed to be getting ready quickly so he wouldn’t miss breakfast or be late to class.

“Nearly!” he called back, and stepped under the shower head, turning the spray on cold.

**TBC**


	2. Chapter 2

“Any word yet on the new Defense Against the Dark Arts professor?” Sirius asked at lunch on Wednesday. He had just come down from the dorm, having slept through his free morning, to meet James and Peter who had just come from Divination.

“No one’s seen him yet,” Peter replied promptly, piling his plate with food and digging in heartily.

“It’s a ‘he’ though?”

“Tha’s wha’ I ‘eard,” the mousy boy responded, spraying bits of food everywhere.

“I heard he’s still in France,” James remarked.

“What’s he doing in France?” Sirius wanted to know.

“Working. Living. Turning little old ladies into newts. How should I know?”

“Just wondering. Is he French, then?”

James shrugged in response, biting into his sandwich.

“You were in France all summer, weren’t you, Sirius?” Peter inquired, mouth empty for a rare moment.

“Paris,” Sirius affirmed.

“You haven’t said anything about it,” Peter pointed out.

Sirius shrugged. He hadn’t said anything to anyone, even James. He wasn’t sure he was going to, either. His time with Remus was special, and he felt a strange desire for it to stay private.

“How was it?” James asked, looking up expectantly.

“Hot,” Sirius replied neutrally, then smiled, remembering.

“What’s the smirk for?”

Sirius quickly arranged his face into a blank expression. “No smirk.”

“Yes smirk! What’d you do in Paris?” James demanded.

“Nothing.”

“ _Who_ ’d you do in Paris?”

“James!”

“You met a girl?” Peter glanced up from his meal, looking interested.

“No.”

“Who is she?”

“There is no girl, Peter!”

“No girl?” James inquired.

“No girl.” Sirius repeated, comfortable in the knowledge that he was telling the truth.

James quirked one eyebrow, giving Sirius a suspiciously significant look. “I see.”

_Shit._ Sirius felt his face heat up. _How could I forget that James_ knows _I don’t like girls?_ “We should get to class,” he said abruptly, and stood, suddenly no longer interested in his lunch.

James smirked knowingly, but followed suit, beckoning for Peter to come along.

Halfway to the classroom, Peter stopped.

James, already at the top of a flight of steps with Sirius, realized his shadow wasn’t keeping up. He turned, and saw the smaller boy rummaging in his bag halfway down the stairs. “What’s up, Pete?”

“I haven’t got my textbook,” Peter sounded half-panicked. “I had it in when we left Divination, and I haven’t got it anymore.”

Sirius groaned.

“You must have left it at lunch,” James told his anxious friend. “We’d better go back for it.”

“Go back for it?” Sirius raised an eyebrow.

“He can’t very well go to the first lesson of the year without his book,” James pointed out.

“I suppose,” Sirius agreed resignedly.

Peter shuffled back and forth from foot to foot, plainly wanting to go fetch his abandoned text, but unwilling to go on his own.

“Let’s go then,” James decided, heading back down the stairs. “We don’t want to be late for class with an unknown teacher.”

“It should be under my seat,” Peter said, sounding relieved, as the three boys headed back towards the Great Hall. “I put it there with my bag.”

But the textbook was not under Peter’s seat, nor anywhere to be seen in the by-now nearly empty Great Hall.

“I _know_ I brought it down!” Peter almost wailed, searching in vain through his bag yet again as they trekked once more toward the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom, walking swiftly to beat the bell.

“Looking for this?” a sneering voice asked from a side passage just behind the three friends.

The Gryffindors all whirled around, coming face to face with several Slytherins in their year and the year below.

Severus Snape stepped forward, holding up the missing book.

“That’s mine!” Peter squeaked angrily.

“Really, Pettigrew?” Snape’s voice dripped sarcasm. “I hadn’t noticed.”

“We don’t have time for you, Snivellus,” James snapped. “Give him the book.”

“I think I’ll keep it. It’s not like your little lackey needs it. He gets all the answers from others.”  
  
“Give him the book, Snivellus,” Sirius snarled, stepping forward aggressively, James not even half a step behind him, “and you won’t get too badly hurt.”

Snape didn’t move, merely sneered. “I’m trembling.”

Sirius and James drew their wands at the same moment.

A split second later, the four Slytherins had drawn their wands as well.

“ _Stupefy_!” shouted one of the Slytherins.

“ _Protego_!” James cried at the same time, and the first hex rebounded off of James’s shield to hit its originator squarely between the eyes, knocking the Slytherin to the floor.

The Head Boy sent a scarlet beam at Snape, singing the greasy boy’s hair.

Snape shrieked, dropping the book, and responded, grazing Sirius’s sleeve.

Sirius, about to retaliate, heard the tell-tale shuffle-run of the caretaker approaching from down the side passage. “Filch!” he yelled.

Instantly, the Slytherins grabbed their unconscious comrade, and fled.

James snatched the book from the floor where Snape had dropped it, shoved it into Peter’s arms, and the three boys took off down the corridor at a run.

“Slimy gits,” Sirius muttered through his teeth, breathing hard.

“I – think – we’ve – lost – him,” Peter panted, several paces behind the taller boys.

“Save your breath,” James gritted. “We’re late.”

Peter groaned, but did as he was told, struggling to keep up with his athletic friends.

The bell signaling the start of class rang, echoing off the stone walls of the castle.

They pounded towards their classroom, running full out, using all the secret passageways they knew.

Sirius skidded around the final corner, followed closely by James and Peter. He wrenched the classroom door open, panting, an apology for the new teacher fully prepared, but as his gaze fell on the man standing at the front of the classroom, the words died on his lips.

Slight build, brown hair glinting gold and red in the early afternoon light flooding through the window…

_It can’t be._

The professor turned at the sound of the door, and his eyes widened in recognition.

Grey locked with amber and the rest of the world vanished.

_It is._

**TBC**


	3. Chapter 3

“Sirius,” James’s breathless voice sounded right by Sirius’s ear, and the long-haired boy jumped, startled. “Sirius, move.”

James pushed Sirius into the classroom and entered, Peter in tow.

“So sorry we’re late, Professor,” James said with a repentant grin, getting his breathing under control. “We ran into a bit of trouble in the hall.”

Amber eyes flicked to James’s face, darting briefly to the boy’s remarkable hair. “James Potter,” he said, almost as if to himself.

James, having heard despite the quiet tone, looked startled. “Yes, Professor. Have we met?”

Amber eyes blinked twice in quick succession, and Sirius recognized the movement as being the brunet’s tell for quick thinking.

“You’re Head Boy,” he said, the pause barely noticeable. He pointed at the badge displayed prominently on James’s chest. “Dumbledore has filled me in.”

“Oh,” James relaxed, fingers touching the badge gently. “Of course. Right.” He glanced quickly at his companions. “Erm, this is Peter Pettigrew and Sirius Black.”

“I’m Professor Lupin.”

“Right, er…” James glanced at the rest of the class.

Everyone was reading the textbook, or, at least, pretending to read the textbook. It was clear most of the students were trying to subtly watch this first meeting of the school’s most notorious troublemakers and the new teacher.

“Shall we sit down, then, Professor?” James asked, jerking his head towards the three seats at the back of the room that had been left empty for the Marauders.

“Yes, of course. Please do.” The brunet nodded, and the three boys headed for their seats.

Sirius could feel the amber eyes on his back as he moved down the aisle behind his friends. He sat, and his eyes once more met those of the man at the front of the room. The brunet looked away quickly, turning his attention to the rest of the class, but Sirius continued to keep his eyes fixed on the new professor.

The double period passed in a blur. Sirius didn’t hear a word that was spoken, merely absorbing the sound of the soft voice and drinking in every movement and gesture. His mind was a maelstrom of questions.

The sound of the bell jolted Sirius from his daze.

“Mr. Potter, Mr. Pettigrew, Mr. Black, if you would remain for a moment,” the teacher’s soft voice was somehow clearly audible above the sudden noise as the class gathered their things together to head out.

The three boys waited until the other students had filed out before heading to the front of the room.

“I’m not going to ask for any explanation as to why you were late,” the amber-eyed professor said as James opened his mouth. “I don’t want to hear any excuses.”

James’s mouth closed with a snap, and a look of grudging respect appeared in his hazel eyes.

“I will merely ask that you not be late for my class again,” he went on. “I’m sure that is not too much to ask.”

Peter and James quickly shook their heads. Sirius followed suit a moment later, still unable to drag his eyes away from the man before him.

“I’m going to ask that one of you stay behind to help me clear up, and let you all off with a warning.” Amber eyes flicked across the three boys. “Mr. Potter, I’m sure you have something important that needs doing. Dumbledore informed me that you and the newly appointed Head Girl, Miss Evans, have many responsibilities. You wouldn’t want her to have to attend to them alone.”

James’s eyes widened, but he nodded.

“Mr. Black, if you’d be so good as to stay behind, Mr. Pettigrew may leave as well.”

Peter and James didn’t need telling twice. With a hasty glance at Sirius, they both departed swiftly.

The door shut behind the two boys, and their footsteps slowly retreated down the corridor outside.

It was so quiet in the classroom the breathing of the two men sounded almost loud as they merely stared at each other. Sirius was sure the beating of his heart was audible.

“I guess you made it back from France after all, Remus,” Sirius finally found his voice to say. He winced at the bitterness in his own tone.

“Don’t do this, Sirius,” Remus whispered.

“What do you want me to say?” Sirius asked. “You lied to me.”

“I didn’t lie to you,” Remus snapped. “I didn’t know I was coming here until after you left. Dumbledore asked for a favor. I agreed. I told you I wanted to teach.”

“Yes, but _here_?” Sirius demanded, glaring. “At _Hogwarts_? You never even told me you were a wizard!”

“You never told me you were a wizard either!” Remus glared right back. “What was I supposed to do? Write and tell you I was coming? You never gave me your address, other than that you live in London. And I couldn’t very well have sent you an owl, since I thought you were a Muggle!”

“Yes, well.” Sirius’s jaw clenched.

“Yes, well.” Remus echoed, only faintly mocking.

They continued to glare fiercely at each other for a long moment. Then, unable to stay put any longer, Sirius closed the distance between them and pulled the smaller man into a bruising kiss.

Remus responded, returning the kiss with fiery familiarity, hands rising to tangle in Sirius’s long hair, tugging with delicious insistence as the older man tried to crush their bodies even closer together.

Sirius groaned into the brunet’s mouth as their tongues danced. His arms slipped around the smaller man’s body, inside the open robe. Almost of their own volition, his fingers began to un-tuck the neat white shirt and slide up beneath the crisp fabric, stroking soft skin, tracing well-known scars. One hand dropped to the shorter man’s belt, scrambling awkwardly with the buckle.

Suddenly, in the split second before the belt came loose, Remus tore away. Gasping for breath, he backed away so quickly he slammed into the large teacher’s desk behind him.

Chest heaving as he fought for air, Sirius stared in confusion. “Rem?” he managed to force out.

“We can’t do this,” Remus rasped, clearly still struggling for oxygen.

“What? Why?”

“Anyone could come in –”

In the blink of an eye, Sirius had whipped out his wand and pointed it at the door, silently casting two charms, a locking spell and a silencing charm. He pocketed his wand again and turned back to the teacher.

But Remus was shaking his head. “No, Sirius. You can’t just lock the door and expect everything to be all right.”

“I put a silencing charm up –”

“It doesn’t matter.” Remus’s face was an emotionless mask, but his eyes looked pained. “We still can’t do this. We can’t be together.”

Sirius felt as though the bottom had fallen out of his stomach. It was the end of the summer all over again, except this time there would be no last night. “Why not?” his voice was choked.

“I’m your teacher, Sirius. And I…” Remus hesitated, then looked away. “You’re too young.”

“I’ll be eighteen this year!” Sirius burst out, hearing a previous argument echo in his head. “I’m already of age.”

“You’re still too young.”

“You’re barely two years older than I am.”

“It doesn’t matter,” Remus snapped. “You’re still my student.”

“We were together before I became your student.”

“And if we get caught, do you think the governors will see it that way? Do you think the Ministry will see it that way?”

“We won’t get caught.”

“Don’t be cavalier, Sirius. You can’t guarantee that. _Someone_ will find out.”

“How?”

“I’ll slip up. You’ll slip up.”

“You won’t slip up. I won’t slip up. I graduate at the end of the year. We can be careful that long!”

“It’s wrong!”

“Why? If we want to be together, why is it wrong?”

“It’s illegal!”

“Who’ll know?” Sirius demanded, desperate now, fearing the circling quarrel.

“ _I_ ’ll know!” Remus burst out.

Sirius took a step back at the vehemence of the brunet’s exclamation.

Remus bit his lip and dropped his gaze, refusing to meet Sirius’s eyes. “I’m sorry, Sirius,” he said, voice full of hurt. “It’s over.” He turned away and walked towards the door, taking out his wand. He tapped the knob once and the door sprang open. He hesitated a moment, as though about to turn back, but then his shoulders squared off and he left, the door swinging closed with a hollow _thud_ behind him.

**TBC**


	4. Chapter 4

Sirius stood where Remus had left him, staring at the semi-tattered briefcase the other man had left on the desk. He was having difficulty breathing.

Slowly, he sank to the ground, unable to support his own weight any longer. His throat was tight and his eyes stung.

He dropped his face to his hands, half choking as he tried to control the sobs that seemed bent on ripping their way out of him.

Flashes of memories from the summer flew through his head like scenes in a Muggle film. He couldn’t stop them.

– – – – –

_“Rain, wonderful,” Sirius muttered, pulling the hood of the Muggle sweatshirt he wore over his head as the grey sky opened up above him to release a torrential downpour. “And, naturally, I’m ages away from the house.” He huddled closer in his already-drenched sweatshirt and broke into a run._

BAM!

_“Ouf,” Sirius grunted, falling back several steps, flailing his arms to keep himself on his feet._

_Hands grabbed Sirius’s wrists and held him upright until he regained his balance._

_“Excusez-moi, monsieur,” (1) the man holding Sirius’s wrists said. “Je ne faisais pas attention.” (2)_

_Sirius stared. The Frenchman had amber eyes. Sirius had never seen anything like it before._

_“Je suis sincèrement désolé, monsieur,” (3) the amber-eyed man said._

_Sirius blinked. “Sorry,” he said, beginning to feel intensely embarrassed. “I, er, don’t speak French. Um… No parle français?” (4)_

_The man, who couldn’t have been more than a year or two older than Sirius, laughed. “Of course you don’t,” he said, still chuckling._

_Sirius felt he should have been offended – Blacks were not people to be laughed at – but he rather liked the sound, and he still felt too embarrassed to feel particularly affronted._

_“I’m very sorry for walking into you,” the Frenchman-who-was-apparently-British (London, if Sirius was any judge of accent) apologized. “I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going.”_

_“Oh, er…” Sirius realized the other man was still holding his wrists. “Not at all, it was my fault. I wasn’t paying attention, either, and I was running. The rain, you know,” he jerked his chin upwards to indicate the still heavily falling precipitation._

_The motion seemed to remind the other man of the maintained contact and he released Sirius at once. “Right. Of course.”_

_“Right.” Sirius shifted uncomfortably._

_“So I suppose we were both at fault then?” the amber-eyed man suggested. “You were running and I was eating.” He looked down and sighed._

_Sirius followed the other man’s gaze and saw the soggy remains of what must have been a croissant only moments before sinking into a puddle._

_“I made you drop it!” Sirius gasped. He wasn’t sure why he was so bothered by a dropped croissant, but he wasn’t particularly interested in analyzing his impulses._

_“No, no, it’s all right,” the other replied hastily. “I really should have waited until I got home to eat…”_

_But Sirius was having none of it. “Please, let me treat you to lunch to make up for it.”_

_“Oh, I couldn’t –”_

_“I insist.” Without waiting for a reply, or stopping to consider his actions, Sirius grabbed the other man’s wrist and together they dashed across the street and into a small café that had an awning stretched over its outdoor seating area._

_Sirius pushed back his hood and shook his head furiously, trying to get some of the water out of his hair. At the sound of laughter, he looked up through his tangled locks._

_“You look like a dog trying to dry off,” the other man explained._

_Sirius couldn’t help but grin. “Maybe dogs have more sense than we give them credit for,” he replied._

_The amber-eyed man laughed again. Removing his hat, he, too, shook his head, drops of water flying from hair that was most likely light brown when dry._

_“It does look a bit doggish,” Sirius agreed, still grinning, then, abruptly remembering his manners, he held out a hand. “I’m Sirius Black.”_

_“Remus Lupin,” his companion returned, firmly grasping his hand._

_Amber eyes met grey and held, and for a long moment neither man moved._

– – – – –

_“The sun’s almost down!” Sirius exclaimed, stopping in the middle of the street._

_Remus glanced up at the sky, a startled expression crossing his features. “I hadn’t realized it was so late,” he murmured, staring at the fiery heavens._

_“Time flies when you’re having fun?” Sirius suggested, sneaking a sidelong look at the man beside him._

_Remus turned to the black-haired boy, a slight smile curling his mouth. “So it does,” he agreed softly._

_They stood in silence for a moment as the sun sank lower on the horizon._

_“I should get home,” Sirius said reluctantly as the darkness settled around them._

_“It was good to meet you, Sirius.” Remus offered a hand. “And thank you for lunch. I haven’t had so pleasant an afternoon and evening in a long time.”_

_“Neither have I,” Sirius replied, taking the proffered hand. A little spark of electricity jumped between them, but neither let go. “Can I see you again?” Sirius asked impulsively._

_“What?” Remus’s incredible amber eyes widened. He tried to pull back._

_“Can I see you again?” Sirius repeated, slightly tightening his hold on the pale hand in his._

_“I…”_

_“Please, Remus?” Sirius was so surprised at his own desperation that he barely registered the pained look in his companion’s eyes._

_“Sirius, I’m not sure that’s a good idea.”_

_“Why not? We had a good time today, didn’t we?”_

_“Yes…”_

_“So what’s the problem?”_

_“I suppose we could see each other again. Sometime.”_

_“Tomorrow?” Sirius inquired eagerly._

_“Tomorrow?”_

_“Yes! Did you have plans?”_

_“Well, no, but –”_

_“Wonderful! The café we had lunch at. We’ll meet there. Noon?”_

_“Sirius, I’m not sure –”_

_“I’ll see you then!” Sirius enthused, then raced off down the street in the direction of his family’s house, leaving the brunet to stand alone, staring after him, hand still partly outstretched._

– – – – –

_“It’s a beautiful day,” Remus remarked, relaxing against the back of the park bench._

_“Beautiful,” Sirius echoed, watching the other man out of the corner of his eye. He’d been fighting a growing attraction to his companion for the past five days, and he wasn’t sure how much longer he could hold out._

_Remus turned to look at Sirius, laying his arm along the bench-back as he shifted positions. “I’ve liked spending time with you these past few days,” he said, a small smile tugging the corners of his lips._

_Sirius casually leaned back, feeling a little tingle run down his spine as Remus’s fingers lightly brushed against the back of his neck. “I have, too,” he replied. “Liked spending time with you, I mean.”_

_“I’m glad.”_

_The fingers brushed against Sirius’s neck again, and he wondered if it had been done on purpose. He mentally shook himself._ Stop letting your imagination get the better of you, Sirius, _he scolded. He smiled at his new friend, and felt a little bubble of happiness grow inside him as the smile was returned._

_Sirius felt another touch on the back of his neck, so light he could barely be sure he hadn’t imagined it. He met Remus’s eyes, searching. Amber eyes met his evenly, a question shimmering just below the surface._

_Impulsively, Sirius leaned in and kissed the other man squarely on the mouth._

_Remus gasped._

_Sirius pulled back as though burnt._ Shit, shit. Bloody hell. Stupid, Sirius! Stupid! Think before you act! You bloody fool. What did you go and do that for? _He could feel his face heat up with embarrassment as panic started to set in._

_Remus was staring at him, a stunned expression on his face._

_Sirius opened his mouth to apologize. “I’m so sor–”_

_He never finished his sentence._

_Remus reached out, fisting one hand in Sirius’s shirtfront to pull him closer as his other hand curled into Sirius’s hair. His lips pressed against Sirius’s in a fierce kiss. After what could have been seconds or hours, he pulled back a few inches to breathe. “You kiss by the book,” he whispered when Sirius had dragged his eyes open. Then he closed the distance between them once more._

– – – – –

_“Looks like rain,” Sirius commented dryly, moments before it started to pour. Lightning cracked overhead._

_Remus burst out laughing. “Run!” he yelled above the roar of the thunder. Catching Sirius’s hand, he pulled the younger man along with him as he dashed through the downpour._

_“Where are we going?” Sirius shouted, trying to make himself heard over the noise of the heavens._

_“My flat!” Remus hollered back. “It’s close!”_

_Just minutes later they stood dripping in the hallway in front of Remus’s door while the brunet fumbled with the lock._

_“It gets stuck sometimes,” Remus muttered, jiggling the key a bit. “Aha!”_

_The door swung back and Remus led the way inside._

_Sirius followed, trying not to show his sudden nerves._

_“Study’s through there,” Remus said, pointing. “I don’t have a parlor. Kitchen’s in here…”_

_But Sirius was only half listening. Through a partially opened door he had seen the large window leading out onto a balcony. The only thing missing from the summer holiday had been flying: the wind and the rain, nothing but a bit of wood and a charm or two keeping him from nature. He missed being able to see for miles in any direction, to be high above people. He liked being high above the world, high above its problems and prejudices. The balcony wasn’t a broom, but still… It was freedom. It was… he couldn’t describe it._

_“It overlooks the Seine,” Remus said in a soft voice. “Would you like to see?”_

_Sirius looked at him and realized that here was someone who understood what Sirius could not put into words. He nodded._

_Remus pushed the door the rest of the way open, and Sirius realized that this was the bedroom. He gulped, and followed the smaller man past the full bed to the window._

_He could barely see anything through the weather-darkened sky and the lashing rain. Without asking permission, he unlatched the window and climbed out onto the narrow balcony._

_Remus followed. “It’s beautiful when the weather’s clear,” he said, mouth close to Sirius’s ear to be heard above the elements. His hot breath washed over Sirius’s cold, damp skin, making the black-haired boy shiver._

_“It’s beautiful now,” Sirius replied. He closed his eyes and tilted his head back, catching the drops of rain in his open mouth. He could feel streams of water trickling down his bare throat, seeping through his already soaked shirt._

_“Beautiful,” Remus’s voice breathed from scant inches away._

_Arms wrapped around Sirius’s waist from behind and he could feel Remus’s body pressed close against his back, wet and hard and warm. Lips caressed his neck, a hot tongue tracing the patterns of the rain._

_Sirius groaned, head tilting more to the side to allow the torturous tongue better access._

_Teeth nipped at Sirius’s ear and he couldn’t suppress a breathy moan. Heavy lids fluttered open and he turned in the other man’s arms._

_“Rem?” he asked. There were butterflies the size of thestrals in his stomach._

_“Let’s go inside.”_

_Sirius nodded, and climbed back in the window, Remus close behind._

_Sirius crossed to the middle of the room and turned to his companion, waiting._

_Remus prowled closer, an expression in his amber eyes that Sirius had never seen before. It was almost predatory._

_Sirius shivered in anticipation._ This is it, _he thought, unable to tear his eyes away from the magnificent creature before him._

_Remus stopped inches away, not touching, but so close Sirius could feel the other man’s heated breath washing over him._

_Sirius’s pulse thundered in his ears, drowning out the sounds of the storm._

_“What do you want, Sirius?” Remus’s voice was low and husky. Slowly, he dragged a knuckle down Sirius’s cheek and across his lower lip._

_Sirius’s lips parted under the touch and he nearly moaned aloud. “You,” he breathed, eyes drifting closed of their own volition as he leaned into the caress._

_A low growl escaped the brunet and Sirius felt a hand curl around the back of his neck and jerk him forward as Remus crushed their mouths together. Tongues battled fiercely for dominance, teeth nipping and tugging at tongue and lip._

_Sirius suddenly realized he had somehow backed up against the bed and his belt had been removed; he himself was struggling with the buttons of Remus’s wet shirt._

_The two men pulled apart to breathe. Remus tugged Sirius’s tee-shirt off over his head before shrugging his own shirt, now fully unbuttoned, off his shoulders._

_Sirius gasped as the action revealed the myriad of scars crisscrossing the pale torso. He reached out a hand, but stopped himself before his fingers could touch the skin. “How –” he started to ask, but Remus was shaking his head._

_“Don’t ask,” the brunet told him. “Old story. It’s not important.” He captured Sirius’s outstretched hand and pressed it against his chest, over his heart._

_Sirius could feel the rapidly pumping organ beating under his palm. He reached for one of Remus’s hands, pressing it to his own heart._

_“Are you nervous?” Remus asked, eyes fixed on the contrast of the pale hand against Sirius’s tanned skin._

_“No,” Sirius said boldly, hoping the swift pace of his pulse didn’t give him away._

_Amber eyes moved to fix grey with a piercing stare. “It’s okay if you are.”_

_Sirius felt himself flush. “It’s just… I’ve never… with a guy…”_

_Remus silenced him with a kiss, much softer than the previous one. “I won’t hurt you,” he murmured when they parted._

_Sirius held his eyes for a long minute before nodding. “I know,” he said quietly. “I trust you.”_

_Slowly, grey eyes still locked on amber, Sirius sat on the edge of the bed and pulled Remus towards him by the hand still on his chest._

_The black-haired boy fell back against the mattress, the brunet braced above him._

_“I’ll go slow,” Remus assured him, voice low and intense, as if he needed Sirius to understand._

_“I trust you,” Sirius said again, and pulled the smaller man down for a kiss._

_Sirius was breathing heavily by the time they parted._

_Remus trailed a path of hot, open-mouthed kisses down Sirius’s throat and across his chest to his navel._

_The grey-eyed boy moaned, writhing in pleasure._

_Within moments, both were fully undressed and Remus came back up for another kiss, grinding their hips together to create delicious friction, one hand reaching for something on the bedside table._

_The sound of a cap snapping off reached Sirius’s ears, but did not register until he felt a single slick finger enter him. His teeth sank sharply into Remus’s lip in surprise._

_“What – ?” he managed to gasp, dragging open eyes he hadn’t realized he had closed._

_“I have to prepare you,” Remus breathed against the younger man’s parted lips. “Otherwise you’ll tear.”_

_Sirius managed a nod, and Remus leant down again, distracting him with kisses as a second finger was added and the two began a scissoring motion. The fingers touched something and Sirius gasped into Remus’s mouth, hips jerking upwards as he saw stars._

_Remus smiled against Sirius’s lips._

_The dark-haired boy groaned, biting down again on Remus’s lip in frustration as the fingers were removed._

_“Shh,” Remus soothed, and Sirius heard the sound of a cap again. “Turn over,” he murmured, but Sirius shook his head._

_“Want to see you,” he whispered, forcing his eyes open once more._

_Remus froze for a moment, but then nodded, shifting so that Sirius’s thighs were up, parallel to his chest. “Ready?” he asked, voice a low rumble vibrating between them._

_Sirius gave a jerky nod, bracing himself._

_“Relax,” Remus instructed, noting the tension in Sirius’s body, then slowly moved forward._

_Sirius groaned again, and bit into his own lip to stop the sound._

_“Relax,” Remus said again._

_Sirius closed his eyes tightly and bit his lip harder, trying to concentrate on the pain caused by his teeth._

_“Sirius…” Remus’s voice was concerned, now, and he started to pull back._

_Sirius shook his head fiercely, eyes flying open, and grabbed the other man’s shoulders to keep him in place._

_Worried amber eyes met Sirius’s grey for a long moment, then Remus leaned in and brushed a soft kiss to Sirius’s cheek, then began trailing feather-light kisses over Sirius’s nose, lips, and eyes._

_“It’s all right, it’s all right,” he murmured, almost crooning._

_Slowly, the muscles in Sirius’s body began to ease. His eyes fluttered shut._

_He felt a slight movement above him, then, in one swift thrust, Remus surged forward, his teeth closing on Sirius’s earlobe a split-second later, forcing Sirius to focus on the sharp pain in his ear instead of the racing burn in his lower body._

_“Okay?” Remus asked after several moments. Sirius could feel the tension in the other man’s body as the brunet fought to keep perfectly still, waiting for Sirius’s body to adjust, to accept him._

_Sirius, breathing ragged, waited another long moment before his eyes opened and he nodded. “Okay,” he said, shifting his hips experimentally._

_A tiny sigh escaped Remus, though whether or not it was relief Sirius couldn’t tell, and then it didn’t matter, as Remus began to move. Slowly at first, then, once they’d found their rhythm, faster._

_Sirius’s hips rose to meet each thrust and one of Remus’s hands reached between them, closing around Sirius’s length, to begin a steady jerking motion in counterpoint._

_It wasn’t long before Sirius exploded, screaming the brunet’s name as he came, his vision going white, and Remus only a split-second behind. They collapsed together and it was several moments before Sirius’s eyes and mind cleared._

_“You all right?” Remus asked. He was curled up next to Sirius on the bed, softly nuzzling the younger boy’s neck._

_“More than all right,” Sirius murmured, suddenly feeling exhausted._

_“You’ll be a little sore in the morning,” Remus cautioned, voice drowsy._

_“Was worth it,” Sirius managed, eyelids drooping._

_“‘m glad,” Remus whispered, pressing a kiss to Sirius’s cheek. “Sleep now.”_

_Within moments, the smaller man’s breath had evened out in slumber._

_Somewhere in the back of his sated and sleepy mind, Sirius noted that the storm had ended and the sky had cleared. He smiled happily, and curled closer to his lover, drifting off to sleep as the light of the waxing gibbous moon painted silvery patterns on the floor._

– – – – –

_“Rise and shine, Sleeping Beauty,” Remus’s voice murmured close to Sirius’s ear._

_Sirius opened his eyes, squinting slightly against the bright morning sunshine pouring through the window. “When did that happen?” he asked groggily, waving vaguely in the direction of the offending light._

_Remus laughed softly. “Several hours ago, actually. I made you some coffee to wake you up. You need to get home, soon, though, or someone will miss you.”_

_“They probably won’t even notice I’m gone, let alone miss me,” Sirius grumbled, but he rolled out of bed anyway._

_Remus made an appreciative noise, and Sirius smirked at the brown-haired man._

_“Like what you see?” he asked, half-teasing, half-inviting, holding out his arms._

_Amber eyes lingered for a moment before snapping up to Sirius’s face. “Get dressed and brush your teeth,” the brunet instructed, turning away – but not before Sirius had noticed the flushed color of his face. “Coffee’s in the kitchen.”_

_Sirius chuckled as he began hunting for his pants._

– – – – –

_“I won’t be able to see you for a few days,” Remus said, carefully spreading jam on a piece of toast._

_“What?” Sirius looked up from his own breakfast, startled._

_“I won’t be around for the next few days,” Remus said, a bit louder._

_“I heard you the first time,” Sirius retorted. “Why won’t you be around?”_

_The brunet didn’t look up from his toast. “I have to go away,” he replied._

_“Where are you going?” the younger man wanted to know._

_“It’s not really any of your business.”_

_Sirius slammed his spoon down on the table. “What the hell do you mean, it’s not my business?”_

_“I mean it’s not your business,” Remus responded calmly._

_“But – I –” Sirius sputtered._

_Remus looked up at him, amber eyes guarded, but sad. “Look, Sirius,” he said, voice soft. “It’s personal. I don’t want to talk about it. Besides, you’ve barely been home these last few days. Don’t your parents wonder what’s happened to you?”_

_Sirius snorted. “They don’t even notice I’m gone. I wasn’t lying when I told you that, before.”_

_They continued breakfast for a while in silence._

_“How long will you be gone?” Sirius asked after a few minutes, judging enough time had passed._

_“Two days,” Remus replied. “Maybe three.”_

_“I’ll miss you,” Sirius said quietly._

_A sad half-smile curled the amber-eyed man’s lips. “I’ll miss you, too.”_

– – – – –

_“Oh, good… Rem, are you okay?” Sirius asked as the afternoon sunlight emphasized both the highlights in Remus’s hair and the dark circles under his eyes._

_“Yes, I’m fine.” Remus patted the bench he was sitting on for Sirius to join him, but the younger man remained standing._

_“You don’t look fine! You look like death warmed over!”_

_“Thank you ever so, Sirius. You have such a way with words. You always know just what to say to make a man feel attractive.”_

_Sirius flushed, but refused to back down. “Is something wrong? Are you sick?”_

_“Sirius…”_

_“Did something happen?”_

_“I’m tired, that’s all.”_

_“Don’t lie to me, Remus. This is the second time you’ve gone away and come back looking like you just crawled out of a grave. Where are you going? What are you doing? What’s wrong?”_

_“I’m just tired, Sirius. I didn’t get much sleep.”_

_“Remus…” Sirius sat, looking intently at his companion._

_“I know you’re concerned, Sirius, but you don’t need to worry.” Remus took one of Sirius’s hands in both of his own. “We only have a few weeks left. Let’s not spoil them.”_

_“Is this your way of reminding me that we’re not in a serious relationship?”_

_“Of course it’s a Sirius relationship,” the brunet joked. “You’re a part of it, aren’t you?”_

_The younger man ignored his frivolity. “Even if our ‘arrangement’ is just for the summer, I wish you would trust me.”_

_“I do trust you, Sirius. There are just certain things you don’t need to know. And where I go is my own business.”_

_Sirius bit his lip, hurt and a little angry, and looked away, out across the park that was in full summer splendor._

_Remus gently turned Sirius’s face back to his own and leaned forward, kissing the dark-haired boy lightly on the mouth._

_Sirius sighed, unable to stay angry, and leaned into the kiss._

_After a moment, Remus pulled back. “Why don’t we go back to my apartment? I can have some tea and you can tell me all about what you did these last two days without me.”_

– – – – –

Sirius wasn’t sure how long he sat there, remembering and shaking with suppressed emotions. It could have been minutes or hours.

When he finally felt he had a grip on himself, he looked up, glancing towards the window. The blood red sun was sinking slowly towards the western horizon, casting long shadows across the deserted classroom. It must have been several hours. James and Peter would probably be wondering what had happened to him. Somehow, he couldn’t really bring himself to care.

He rose to his feet, feeling empty and raw.

Slowly, he gathered his things together and turned to leave.

He froze.

There, in the doorway, stood Remus.

For a long moment, they stared at each other.

Sirius realized he must look like a wreck: eyes red and puffy, face blotchy and streaked. Remus didn’t look much better; his hair was mussed, his eyes were red and strangely bright, and it looked as though he’d been biting down hard on his lower lip. _Just like the end of the summer,_ Sirius thought.

“I needed my briefcase,” Remus finally broke the silence. His voice was slightly choked.

Sirius nodded.

Neither man moved.

**TBC**

Remus’s French was translated for me by Miss JaD (thank you, dear!). Sirius’s (botched) French is my own doing.

(1) “Excusez-moi, monsieur.” – “I’m sorry, sir.”

(2) “Je ne faisais pas attention.” – “I wasn’t paying attention.”

(3) “Je suis sincèrement désolé, monsieur,” – “Truly, I’m very sorry, sir.”

(4) “No parle français?” – Sirius’s botched attempt at “I don’t speak French.”


	5. Chapter 5

The tension as the two men stood staring at each other in silence was so thick, Sirius was vaguely surprised that they hadn’t both suffocated.

He shifted, feeling awkward and uncomfortably young.

_I love you,_ he wanted to say. _Don’t say it’s over. Don’t leave. Don’t leave me. I love you._

In the dying light, Remus’s amber eyes glittered.

_I love you. I love you. I love you._ The words hung on the tip of Sirius’s tongue, but he held them in. He’d bared his heart before. It had led him here. He didn’t think he could survive another blow so soon after the first.

He took a deep breath, making a decision in the leaden stillness. He would not say it again until Remus had said it. Remus knew where he stood. Though he didn’t know how, Sirius knew that, deep down, Remus felt the same – something in the amber eyes perhaps. Windows to the soul. At least, Sirius hoped.

It took all of his strength to walk to the front of the classroom, pick up the tattered briefcase, and cross to the man standing in front of the door. He held it out.

“Your briefcase, Professor Lupin.”

The brunet flinched, as though he’d been struck. Automatically he took the proffered bag. “Sirius –” he began.

But Sirius was already moving past him and out the door. He couldn’t trust himself just then to keep the words he longed to shout bottled up. He had to get away.

The door slammed shut behind him then opened again almost instantly. Sirius fought the urge to turn, instead speeding up and rounding the corner, putting as much distance as he could between himself and the figure he knew was watching him walk away.

– – – – –

“Where the _hell_ have you been?” James demanded loudly the moment Sirius climbed into the Gryffindor common room through the portrait hole.

Sirius, who would have just gone up to their dorm to hide in sleep, turned to face his friend.

James stared in shock then half rose to his feet. “What happened to you?” he asked in a much lower voice.

Sirius’s hand rose automatically to his face and he quickly brushed away the lingering wetness from his cheeks. “Nothing,” he muttered. “I’m going to bed.” He turned and hurried away, up the spiral staircase, and into the dorm room at the top of the stairs.

He closed the door quietly behind him, resisting the desire to slam it, and let his body sag heavily backwards against the sturdy wood.

_What am I doing?_ he wondered. _What is wrong with me? It was never supposed to be like this. It was supposed to just be the summer. He knew I was leaving. I knew I was leaving. We both just wanted…_ He closed his eyes. _No,_ he reminded himself firmly. He could not lie to himself about anything anymore. _No. I never_ just _wanted… I just didn’t realize… But I_ knew _I loved him. I_ told _him I loved him. He never told me. What did_ he _want? What_ does _he want? Is he glad to have seen me again? Was he sorry when I left? Was he just…_

Then fear struck.

_What if he leaves? Will he leave? He can’t leave. He_ can’t _leave. He won’t leave. I won’t let him leave. I won’t let him leave me. He’ll stay. He’ll_ want _to stay. I’ll make him want to stay. I know he… I_ hope _he… He has to…_ Sirius shook his head, confused, hopeful, scared.

_I need a plan,_ he thought, trying to convince himself, but only half believing. _That’s all. I just need a plan, and everything will work out._

He made himself move away from the door and prepare for bed.

The question, he realized, forcing himself to focus on this new idea instead of on his disastrous encounters with his new teacher, was whether or not he could talk to James about it. Another perspective could make all the difference, and James had always been his partner in crime. There was no chance of his telling Peter, the smaller boy knew nothing of Sirius’s – preferences – and Sirius had no intentions to enlighten him. James was really the only person Sirius could even consider asking for help, but what if he asked and James refused? James had never had a problem before with rule-breaking, but this wasn’t just a rule, it was the law. What if James disapproved? When Sirius had first come out to James, the other boy had said he was all right with it and, so far, he had been, but this was different, this was a _teacher_.

_I have to risk it,_ Sirius thought, both comforted by having come to a decision and terrified that it would backfire. _He’s the only one I can trust with this and I can’t hold it in any longer. I need his help. I need his support. I need to know he’ll still be my friend._

Sirius stared for a long moment at his reflection in the mirror over the sink, toothbrush clamped between his teeth.

_Tonight,_ he decided. _I have to tell James tonight._

– – – – –

Sirius was just crawling into his bed with a book to read while he waited for James when the boy in question entered the dorm with a determined look on his face.

James scanned the room quickly, spotted Sirius, and marched over.

“Look,” James began, voice forceful, before Sirius could so much as open his mouth. “I realize it’s probably not my business, or, at least, you probably don’t think it’s my business, and I respect that you probably don’t think it’s my business, but you’ve been in a mood since you got back from Paris. I don’t know what it was, but I know it was something and I know that something happened while you were gone. And I also know that something happened tonight.”

“James,” Sirius started, but he was cut off.

“And I don’t _care_ if you think it’s not my business. This is bothering you quite a lot and you’re my friend and that _makes_ it my business.”

Sirius tried again. “James –”

“And I want to know, is it your parents or…? Did they do something in France? Do they _know_? Did they _say_ something? Did you get an owl after class? Is that why you disappeared? Where did you go? Was it –”

“James!” Sirius grabbed his friend by the shoulders and shook him fiercely. “Will you _shut up_?”

James subsided, looking stunned.

“Thank you,” Sirius sighed with relief and released the hazel-eyed boy. Then he sighed again, a more anxious sound, the prospect of actually telling James everything making him a bit nervous. “Look,” he said, then stopped, gathering himself together. He hadn’t really figured out exactly how to go about spilling his somewhat sordid tale to his best friend in such a way that said best friend would not panic, desert him, and have him locked up… or worse, have _Remus_ locked up. “Look,” he said again, trying to keep his nerves under control. “It’s not my parents – or my family at all – for once. It’s… This summer I…”

“You met someone,” James supplied abruptly.

Sirius stared. “I… You… How did you…?”

“Know?” asked James.

Sirius nodded, unable to speak.

“‘No girl,’” James reminded him.

“Oh.” _Lunch._ “Right.”

“And you’re in love with him,” James went on.

Sirius’s jaw dropped a bit in shock. It hadn’t been a question.

“You look like I feel every time I think about Lily Evans,” James explained in response to Sirius’s amazed gape.

Sirius picked up his jaw. “I guess that makes two of us getting rejected, then,” he told the messy-haired boy.

James was silent for a long moment, concern apparent in his hazel eyes. Finally, he asked, “What happened? Who was he?”

_This is it,_ thought Sirius. _He already knows this much. And I_ need _to tell him the rest, for my own sanity. I need his support and I need his help to make Remus stay. But first…_ “Are you sure you want to know?” he had to ask.

**TBC**


	6. Chapter 6

… “Are you sure you want to know?” Sirius asked.

James, about to nod and say ‘of course’ as he always did, hesitated for a moment at Sirius’s sober expression, considering. Then he nodded firmly. “Of course I do,” he assured the grey-eyed boy, then added quickly, “If you want to tell me.

Sirius nodded, feeling a weight lift, then sat down cross-legged on his bed, picking up the book he had dropped in order to shake his friend, and stared at it silently for a few moments, trying to organize his thoughts.

James joined the grey-eyed boy on the bed and waited, not saying anything, knowing Sirius well enough to realize just how important this was and just how much it was costing Sirius to have this conversation.

“It was completely by chance that we met,” Sirius began. A little voice in the back of his head commented that this sounded like story hour. It sounded a bit like James and a bit like himself. He ignored it. “We ran into each other one afternoon.” He paused. “And I mean that literally.” He brought his hands together with a clap to indicate the collision. “I fell. He caught me, but dropped his croissant.” Sirius laughed slightly, a little bitterly, at the irony of his words. _Did I ever fall,_ he thought.

James had chuckled, but at the caustic sound of his friend’s laugh he fell silent, waiting for Sirius to continue.

“I treated him at a café to apologize,” Sirius went on. “Then we went for a walk. We completely lost track of time. It was incredible. We were just talking and then, all of a sudden, it was dark. I just had to see him again. I didn’t give him a chance to say ‘no.’” He fidgeted with his book for a moment. “We got on really well,” Sirius continued. “I didn’t tell him I was a wizard, of course, and I was always careful around him, so he never suspected.” Sirius took a deep breath. “It was five days before I had the balls to kiss him. I was so afraid of scaring him off. For a moment,” he said, remembering, “I thought I had. But then he kissed me back. I spent nearly the entire holiday with him. My parents never noticed. Even…” Sirius could feel the color rising in his face, “Even when I started staying out all night.”

James made a strange noise.

Sirius finally looked up, not sure what he would see.

The messy-haired boy’s hazel eyes had gone very wide.

“James?” Sirius probed hesitantly.

James blinked several times in rapid succession and swallowed hard. When he spoke, it was in a very would-be-casual sort of voice. “So… so you and he…”

“Had sex,” Sirius said in a soft voice. “Yes.”

“Do you have to say it like that?” James demanded testily, voice now much more like his own.

“How do you want me to say it?” Sirius inquired. “We shagged? We screwed? We _fucked_?”

James winced. “You made love?” he suggested.

Sirius snorted. “Don’t be naïve, James.”

“But… didn’t you? I thought you were…”

Sirius snorted again. “First of all, whether I am or not, that’s the most ridiculous, idiotic, phrase that has ever had the misfortune to be clichéd.”

“But…” James hesitated before he ploughed on. “Aren’t you?”

Sirius felt his face heat up. “Well, yes,” he muttered. “But I didn’t know it at the time. I wasn’t thinking, ‘Oh, I love you.’ It was more, ‘I need you. You’re amazing. I want you _now_.’”

“Is it…” James hesitated again. “Is it always like that?”

Sirius flushed even darker. “At first,” he said, forcing himself not to mumble. “I just wanted him, and then I realized I wanted to be _near_ him. Close to him. _With_ him. We were just supposed to be together for the summer, but then I realized I didn’t want it to end. I didn’t want to give him up.”

James, too, had gone slightly red and he looked somewhat amazed. “Wow,” he said. “I mean, that’s not what I’d meant when I asked – I mean, I guess what you… Er… What you thought I mean to meant, I mean, meant to mean was… But… Wow.”

_Huh?_ “What you meant to mean?”

“I’d meant, is it _always_ like that?”

“I don’t –”

“With _everyone_.”

“You mean…?”

“Yes,” James said in a rush. “With girls, too.”

“Oh.” Sirius felt slightly off kilter. He wasn’t quite sure when his confession and plea for help had been sidetracked into a sex talk. “Well…” he tried to remember the few girls he’d been with. “I certainly wasn’t in love with any of them,” he said at last. “I wasn’t even particularly attracted to them. I was confused. And drunk,” he admitted, staring back down at his book. “I don’t really remember much, to be honest. What I did remember after, I’ve tried to forget.”

“Right. Of course. Sorry.” James looked supremely embarrassed.

“I’m sure it won’t be like that for you,” Sirius hastily assured his friend, looking up again.

“How can you be so sure?”

_He sounds really nervous. When did this happen? Why are we even talking about this? I need to talk to him about Remus so he can_ help _me!_ “Because you actually _like_ girls,” Sirius reminded him, a bit more acidly than he had intended.

“Oh. Yeah. Right.” James grinned sheepishly, looking fairly awkward but much more cheerful. “So. Your great French lover. Continue.”

“He’s British, actually,” Sirius said, feeling slightly relieved to be back on track, and slightly nervous again. “He went to school in France and decided to stay there afterwards. He told me he wanted to teach.”

“A teacher?” James chuckled. “Kinky.”

Sirius lifted an eyebrow, but suddenly felt much easier about talking. He was very glad James was comfortable enough with this to joke about it. “Well, we’d known from the start that it was just for the summer,” Sirius said for what felt like the millionth time. “But then I realized I wanted more. Sometimes I thought he did, too. I even thought about telling him the truth.”

“What happened?” asked James, voice almost hushed.

“I told him I loved him,” Sirius confessed.

“Did you really?” James’s eyes were wide with awe.

Sirius nodded. “I asked him to come back with me. I said we should live together.”

James’s eyes grew even wider. “What did he do? Did he say anything?”

“He said I was too young. That it had to end.”

“And then?”

“I asked him for one last night. Most amazing sex I’ve ever had. He was gone when I woke up the next morning and I couldn’t wait for him. He knew I wouldn’t be able to wait. My parents would have noticed I was gone if I’d stayed any later. No note from him. Nothing. And then I was back in London, and now here. And I can’t forget him. I don’t want to forget him. I still love him. And I think he loves me. He’s just scared.”

“So… Are you going to go back to France to find him?” James sounded slightly confused.

“No,” Sirius said slowly. “He’s not in France anymore.”

“Not in France?” James repeated, confusion clearly growing. “How do you know that? Do you know where he is?”

“He’s here,” Sirius replied. “And I know because I’ve seen him here.”

“Oh.” James was scowling slightly, looking more bewildered with each passing moment. “So… Do you need me to cover for you?”

“No,” Sirius shook his head. “I need your help keeping him here. I’m afraid he might leave, go back to France, and I’ll never see him again. I need a plan, and I can’t do it alone.”

James’s brows were still knit together in a frown. He appeared to be thinking hard about something. It was the look he always got when he was piecing things together. “What did you say his name was?” he asked, voice a little strange. “This, this love of your life?”

Sirius’s eyebrows twitched. “I didn’t,” he informed his friend, then looked down, biting his lip. “It’s Remus,” he said softly after a moment. He took a deep breath.

_Last chance,_ he thought. _Last chance to back out. I can stop now. Let that be the end of it. Sit in class like it’s nothing. Get over him if I can. Let him go, even if I can’t. I can let it be over, as he said. I can believe he doesn’t care. I can learn to live with not knowing if he ever did. This is my last chance to walk away._ He didn’t take it. He couldn’t.

He looked up and met James Potter’s hazel eyes. “Remus Lupin.”

**TBC**


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m trying something with this chapter. The second half of it switches POV (it should be pretty obvious when it happens). It should switch back sometime in the next chapter. This is, after all, Sirius’s story to tell.

… “Remus Lupin.”

James stared.

Sirius held his gaze. As the silence stretched longer and longer, becoming increasingly uncomfortable, he felt the need to look away, or fidget, but he forced himself to stay still.

Finally, James broke the awkward silence. “Lupin?” he asked, sounding strangely calm, as though he were merely trying to clarify some fact for a prank. “As in _Professor_ Lupin? As in our Defense Against the Dark Arts professor, Professor Lupin?”

Sirius nodded, feeling tense.

“You didn’t say that he was a wizard.”

Sirius shook his head, unable to speak.

“And you did mean _here_ , here,” it wasn’t a question. “I’d thought you meant here, as in _this country_ , here.”

“No,” Sirius managed to get out. “Hogwarts.”

“But I thought _he_ didn’t know _you_ were a wizard.”

“He didn’t,” Sirius replied, still on edge. James didn’t _seem_ to be taking this too badly. “We both thought the other was a Muggle, so neither of us ever mentioned magic.”

“So he’s not here because he followed you?”

“No. He didn’t know I was here. I’d only ever told him I was from London.” Sirius paused, then added, “He didn’t seem overly thrilled to see me, this afternoon.”

“Well, if he didn’t follow you, what’s he doing here?” James sounded as though he thought that was the only logical explanation for the man’s appearance at their school.

“Teaching,” Sirius reminded him, relief starting to settle in. “He said he wanted to.”

“Yes,” James nodded agreement. “But why here? Why not teach in France? He must have attended Beauxbatons, it’s the only wizarding school in France, after all, isn’t it? Why not apply for a job there?”

“I don’t think he applied for the job here,” Sirius said slowly, thinking. “He said Dumbledore asked him for a favor and he agreed.”

“How does he know Dumbledore if he didn’t go to Hogwarts?”

“Everyone knows Dumbledore,” Sirius replied with a shrug.

“Yes,” James agreed again. “But if Lupin’s been out of the country for the last, what, decade? How does Dumbledore know _him_?”

“Hunh.” _I hadn’t thought of that. But really…_ “Well, it’s Dumbledore. He seems to have connections everywhere, doesn’t he?”

“I suppose,” James conceded dubiously. Then his expression changed, becoming more serious. “What happened after class?” he wanted to know. “He kept you behind on purpose. What did he do to you?”

“What makes you think he did something to me?” Sirius inquired.

“I saw you when you came back,” James reminded him. “You looked as if a werewolf had just eaten your firstborn – no offense to werewolves, of course, Mum says they’re not all bad, and she’d know, since she actually used to talk to them quite a bit when she worked at the Ministry’s Department of…” he trailed off, looking apologetic for running off on yet another tangent.

“He didn’t do anything to me,” Sirius said, then sighed. “Nothing he hasn’t done before, at any rate.”

James’s eyes grew very wide. “Did you…”

“What?” Sirius asked, confused. “Did I…” _Oh._ “Oh. Did _we_. No. No. We did not.”

“Then what…”

“He told me it was over.” Something in Sirius’s chest constricted painfully and his stomach felt suddenly sick. He hadn’t said the words aloud before. He swallowed – hard. “I mean, I hated it, but I knew it was over before, this summer, but then he was _here_ and I thought –” he paused, and then it felt as though something inside of him snapped and the words were tumbling fast and furious and Sirius could not stop them. “And then I kissed him, and he kissed me back, so I hoped – But he pushed me away and said it was wrong and he’s my teacher and I’m too young, but he’s barely two years older, and he left, and I couldn’t handle it, and he came back, and I couldn’t handle it, so _I_ left, and then you, downstairs, and here, and I had to tell you, because you have to help me, because I love him, and I think he might love me, but I don’t think he’ll ever say it because he’s scared of something and there’s something that he won’t tell me, something I think might be hurting him, and I want to know what it is, because I have to make it stop, because he can’t hurt, nothing can make him hurt, I won’t let it, and I don’t care what I have to do, because I will to anything to help him, if he’d only let me, but I need him. I need him to tell me he loves me. I need him to love me. What if he doesn’t love me? Nobody else loves me. My parents, my brother. Why should he love me? But I love him, and I need him to… Why doesn’t he love me, James? I love him. I love him. So much. Why won’t anyone ever love me?” And, somehow, there were tears sliding down Sirius’s cheeks as fast and free as the words that had poured off his tongue, and his throat had closed off, damming any more sound.

James reached out a hand as if to touch Sirius’s shoulder, then pulled back abruptly, looking unsure.

Sirius stared at him, confusion and hurt threatening to swamp him for a second time that day. The hot droplets of salty water splashed down on the book in his hands, but he barely noticed. He felt lost and sick.

“Sirius…” James hesitated, then his face crumpled in reflected misery. “Fuck,” he swore, and reached out to grab Sirius, hauling his friend towards him and gathering him close in a rough embrace.

– – – – –

Remus Lupin sat alone in his office, staring at an open book without actually seeing it. On the desk before him was a cup of herbal tea that had long since gone cold, his tattered briefcase, and a shallow box full of photographs, ticket stubs, receipts, and a red coffee mug with the phrase ‘Chocolate: the Miracle Cure’ in gold lettering.

His eyes prickled and stung, but remained dry as he stared blindly at the text before him. He would not cry. He had done enough of that for one day, done enough for a year, or two, at least. He hadn’t even cried so much when he was a small boy and… No. He wouldn’t cry. He was doing the right thing. Had done the right thing, this afternoon, and in Paris not even two weeks ago. But if it was the right thing, why did it feel as though someone was twisting a knife in his chest?

The sudden banging on his door jolted him roughly out of his miserable musings, making him jump slightly in his seat and drop his book. He bent hastily to retrieve the fallen volume and place it on his desk before crossing the room to investigate the disturbance.

He jerked the door open a little more harshly than was necessary and was nearly hit in the face for his pains. Only a quick half-step back on his own part and the swift reflexes of the young man in the corridor saved him from what might have been a broken nose.

Remus blinked at his late-night guest. “Mr. Potter.”

“Professor.”

Somehow, Remus felt the courteous title was meant as an insult. Unsure if he was imagining it or not, he chose to ignore it. “To what do I owe this unexpected visit?”

The Head Boy casually shoved his hands in the pockets of the jeans he wore under his open robe. “I need to talk to you.”

“Oh?” Remus raised an eyebrow. Something strange was going on. “Isn’t it a bit late for tutoring sessions?”

“I suppose it is,” Potter conceded easily. “So it would seem a good thing, then, that I’m not here for tutoring.”

Remus clicked his tongue softly, beginning to feel irritated. He was too tired and upset for games. Especially with James Potter. “Curfew is well passed, Mr. Potter,” he informed the student. “I realize you are given certain allowances due to your privileged position, but I hardly feel social calls at this hour are appropriate.”

“It’s not exactly a social call, either,” the boy replied smoothly. “And it can’t wait until a more… _appropriate_ … hour. Perhaps you would be so good as to invite me in. I hardly feel this is something you want discussed where anyone could overhear.”

Remus didn’t miss the slightly mocking tone, and his irritation grew, but he refused to let it show. “I highly doubt there is anything so urgent that it cannot wait until tomorrow, Mr. Potter,” he said firmly, not moving away from the door. “It’s very late. Why don’t you stop by here tomorrow before breakfast, and we can discuss whatever this is then?” He’d heard enough about the boy to know he needed to be able to concentrate if he were going to go head to head with Sirius’s best friend.

He started to close the door, deciding that was the end of the matter. But the door didn’t close. There was a foot blocking it.

Remus tried very hard not to grit his teeth. “Mr. Potter, would you _kindly_ remove your foot from my door?”

“I’m afraid I can’t do that, Professor.” He didn’t seem the slightest bit apologetic about it. “But I really must talk to you tonight. It’s a very personal matter, you see, concerning another one of your students, a very close friend of mine. Sirius Black.”

The bottom dropped out of Remus’s stomach and he almost stumbled. Only his grip on the door kept him from falling. He could feel the blood draining from his face.

A faint look of satisfaction crossed the Head Boy’s visage as though he knew exactly what Remus was feeling and approved. “Ah,” he said, very softly. “I thought that might get your attention. Will you let me in, now? Or shall we have this conversation in the corridor?”

Remus stepped backwards into his office, allowing the dark-haired man entrance, then swiftly shut and locked the door behind his unwelcome guest. As he turned back to the room, he saw the messy-haired intruder settle comfortably into one of the chairs in front of the desk, resting one ankle on the opposite knee.

“What do you want?” he asked as he retreated to his own chair behind the desk, feeling vaguely grateful to have the large, sturdy piece of furniture between himself and this unforeseen accuser. There was something about this boy that screamed _danger!_ despite his apparently serene attitude.

The bespectacled boy gave a small snort, a harsh, almost vicious, look flickering briefly on his face before being replaced by calm passivity. “Do you really care what I want?” he asked, voice quite nearly friendly. “You didn’t care what he wanted, did you?”

Remus said nothing.

After a moment, the hazel-eyed youth continued. “You must know I won’t turn you in. I would never do anything purposefully that might get Sirius into trouble, not _real_ trouble, and certainly not without his consent.”

Remus blinked. _Does that mean Sirius doesn’t know he’s here?_ he wondered.

A single black eyebrow twitched. “No, he doesn’t know I’m here,” Potter informed the professor.

Remus started, he hadn’t realized he’d spoken aloud.

The black eyebrow twitched again, more sharply this time, and the expression in the hazel eyes darkened. “He’s asleep. I doubt he would be happy if he knew I were here.”

Remus frowned slightly in confusion.

“He’s very determined that you not be hurt, you see,” Potter said by way of explanation. “He has a good heart, you know, and hates to see anyone in it in any sort of pain. Unfortunately, he’s not always so careful about whom he lets in, or, apparently, to whom he gives it.”

Remus swallowed. This was not going well. How much did this boy actually know? Had Sirius told him everything, or was he only working off a small bit of information? Remus wasn’t sure how he felt about Sirius telling his friend anything, let alone everything, but he supposed he should have expected it, after all he’d heard about James Potter over the summer, the two were obviously very close. A small pang of jealousy wormed its way into Remus’s chest. He tried to throttle it, but only succeeded in tamping it down.

Potter was watching him very closely and the scrutiny was making Remus very nervous.

“If you have something to say, Potter, please get on with it,” he finally snapped. “I have work to do, and you should be in bed.”

The younger man’s eyes narrowed briefly, but his voice, when he spoke, betrayed nothing. “Sirius is closer to me than a brother.”

There was that jealousy again, accompanied by the irrational thought, _Is that all there is between them? Brotherhood?_

“I don’t like to see him hurt any more than he likes to see his friends hurt. You’ve hurt him. What are you going to do about it?”

Remus stared. This was not what he had expected at all. He wasn’t quite sure what he _had_ expected, but this was certainly not it. How was he meant to respond? He wasn’t even sure how much Sirius had shared.

“I’m sorry I hurt him,” he said slowly, trying to fight the pain welling up inside of him again. “I never meant to. And it’s over now. I ended it.” He never should have let things get so out of hand to begin with. He swallowed. “He should move on.”

“I don’t think you quite understand.” Potter’s hazel eyes had darkened. “I know what happened this summer, and I know what happened this afternoon. He’s _in love_ with you. You know he is, he told you. He’s not going to just _move on_. When you _ended it_ with him… You’ve completely destroyed him. I barely recognized him when I saw him this evening, he’d been crying so hard. How would you feel if someone ripped out your heart? I didn’t know what to do. I’d never thought anyone would be so cruel as to treat him like this. And you! You know how hard things are for him. You know what his family’s like, how he had to sneak around all summer to be with you. After all that, are you telling me you were just using him? That you got what you wanted, and decided it was too much of a bother to keep him around so you just dropped him, like an old robe?”

“It wasn’t like that –” Remus tried to protest, ill at the thought of how badly Sirius must be hurting for his friend to confront a teacher about it, but then he forced himself to stop. He couldn’t just blurt out to this youth something he was still trying to deny to himself. _But Sirius…_

Hazel eyes glittered dangerously. “Then what was it like?”

Remus dropped his gaze for a moment, feeling sick and guilty, then looked back up at the boy across the desk. “I never should have let it start.”

Potter’s jaw tightened briefly, then he rose to his feet and moved closer, leaning in over the desk until his face was only a foot from Remus’s. “You disgust me,” he hissed, low and venomous. He moved away slightly, an expression so calm and pleasant on his face it was frightening. “I just want to let you know,” he remarked, voice perfectly amiable, eyes harder than granite, “that if you weren’t a teacher, I would punch you in the face right now, and I’d do it with a smile. After what you’ve put him through, you deserve far worse.”

He pulled back, and, as he turned to go, his elbow caught the corner of the box on the desk, sending it crashing to the floor, the contents spilling out, the mug smashing into pieces as it made contact with the ground, bits of paper fluttering slowly through the air before coming to rest amid the wreckage.

“ _No_!” Remus lunged over the desk, knocking his briefcase and teacup aside in his haste, barely noticing as the cold tea spilled on his book.

Potter leapt out of the way.

Remus knelt, picking up the shards of the mug and cradling them against his chest, somehow feeling worse than he had since returning to his office.

Potter had crouched beside him and was sifting through the mess. “What the hell is all this?” he demanded, voice odd.

Remus looked up, still slightly in shock at the loss of the mug, and saw that the messy-haired boy was staring through his spectacles at several photos of Sirius sleeping in various stages of undress.

**TBC**


	8. Chapter 8

After a moment, Potter started shuffling through all the fallen contents of the box. All of the ticket stubs and receipts were from the summer. The photos – all Muggle – were mostly of Sirius asleep, though there were a few featuring both Remus and Sirius at the park, or a museum, or outside the cinema, obviously taken by someone else at Sirius’s insistence, as the images of Remus clearly showed that he was less than pleased at being photographed. But the pictures of Sirius…

Remus wanted to tell the younger boy to stop touching everything, that those pictures were _private_ , captured moments of innocence, brief flashes of Sirius calm and at peace, as he never was awake, but the words wouldn’t form.

“What the fuck are these?” Potter demanded again, disgust now evident in his voice. The photo he was looking at was of Sirius asleep on his stomach, hair partly covering his face, a sheet draped low over his hips, one bare leg partly uncovered. He was clearly nude under the sheet, and, at the base of his neck, was the fading bruise of a love bite.

_Memories,_ Remus thought, but could not seem to say. His throat wasn’t working properly. His hands clenched compulsively. The sharp edges of the shattered mug cut into Remus’s palms, but he barely noticed the pain. He looked down at the shards in his hands, only partly aware that they were now spattered with drops of his own blood. It was as if time had stopped, but everything was still falling apart, crumbling to dust.

“What is _wrong_ with you?” Potter’s harsh voice broke the bubble Remus seemed to have sunk into.

He looked up, and realized the hazel eyes were no longer fixed on the contents of the box, but on Remus himself.

Remus opened his mouth, but no sound came out. He closed it again, feeling young and lost, and looked back down at the bits of red and gold ceramic in his bleeding hands.

“It’s just a mug,” Potter’s voice snapped, but there seemed to be an undercurrent of something besides disgust and antagonism in his tone.

Remus felt his face flush with something akin to anger as he looked at the Head Boy once more, and he felt his voice return. “It is _not_ ‘just a mug,’” he snarled, holding the pieces even closer to his chest.

Potter drew back, startled, then his dark brows twisted downwards in a frown. “So fix it.”

Remus blinked, not quite comprehending what the dark-haired boy meant.

The frown behind the spectacles deepened, and, in the blink of an eye, Potter had drawn his wand, leaned forward, reached out, and tapped the remnants of the mug. “ _Reparo_ ,” he bit out, and the pieces flew back together as if they’d never been apart.

Remus stared at the repaired mug, then he looked up again. “I –” he tried, but then his throat closed off. His gaze returned to the restored mug. His fingers gently caressed it, as though searching on their own for cracks.

The door slammed and Remus’s head jerked up. He was alone.

Carefully, he placed the mug back in the box, and began picking up the other scattered contents, lingering over a playbill, a menu, a photograph, fighting new tears.

– – – – –

_Sirius sat on the corridor floor, head resting on arms folded on drawn up knees. He felt as if he’d been waiting for hours, but there was still daylight filtering in through the window at the end of the hall and he hadn’t been able to get away from his brother until late afternoon._

_His head jerked up at the sound of approaching footsteps. A familiar brunet figure emerged from the stairwell and Sirius was on his feet before he’d even realized he was in motion._

_“Sirius?” Remus looked startled. “What are you doing here?”_

_“Waiting for you. Where’ve you been?”_

_Remus frowned, and, for a moment, Sirius feared he would tell him it was none of his business – as he so often had those first few weeks when Sirius had asked anything personal – but then his mouth twitched, and he shrugged. “The library.”_

_“I thought you only worked –”_

_“They needed me to track an old book down,” Remus explained before Sirius could even finish his sentence. “It took a bit longer than I’d expected, and then I got sidetracked.” He gave Sirius a lopsided grin that made Sirius’s insides melt. “You know how I am with books.”_

_“Yeah,” Sirius breathed._

_Remus stared at him for a long moment then shook himself and started rooting around in his pockets. “I thought we were meeting at the restaurant for dinner,” he remarked, pulling out his keys and inserting the correct one into the lock. He jiggled the key until the lock clicked and pushed the door open._

_“I didn’t want to wait,” Sirius replied, following the older man inside. “And you’re usually back from work by the time my parents vanish for the day.”_

_Remus looked at him, startled. “You’ve been sitting in the hall all afternoon?”_

_Sirius shook his head. “No, Regulus was going on about… stuff, and wouldn’t bugger off.” He fiddled with the hem of his shirt. “I’ve not even been here an hour.”_

_“I see,” Remus nodded. His eyes were fixed on Sirius’s hands._

_Sirius grinned, noticing the direction of his companion’s gaze, and ambled closer, sparing a quick glance at the door to make sure he’d locked it on entering. “You’re wearing a tie,” he remarked, no longer amazed at how his voice had lowered to a husky purr. He reached out a finger and dragged it down the silky cloth, delighting in the feel of Remus shivering under his touch, close enough now that he could feel the other man’s heated breath on his skin._

_“Work,” Remus replied, the one word soft and slightly scratchy._

_“Mm,” Sirius nodded, shifting closer, hand closing around the knot in the tie and using it to pull the brunet against him. “Looks good,” he murmured against soft lips, then nipped lightly at the bottom one._

_Remus’s chin tilted up slightly, lips parted, eyes dark. “Yeah?”_

_“Yeah.” Sirius’s tongue darted out to swipe teasingly at the parted lips._

_Then Remus’s hands were tangling in his hair, yanking him closer, mouth hot and sweet against Sirius’s as they stumbled blindly towards the bedroom._

_The backs of Sirius’s knees hit the side of the bed and he went over backwards, landing with a soft_ thwump _on the mattress, Remus on top of him. They broke apart with a gasp. Remus knelt up, straddling Sirius’s legs, and scrabbled hastily with his shirt buttons. Sirius used the moment to tug his own shirt off over his head. Remus slid out of his shirt and dropped it over the side of the bed, hands moving to unknot his tie._

_Sirius’s hands joined Remus’s at the tie, stilling them. “Wait,” he murmured even as the knot slipped loose._

_Remus looked up, amber eyes meeting grey._

_For a long moment, neither moved._

_Then Remus cocked his head slightly. “You want –”_

_“Yeah,” Sirius cut him off. His heart was pounding double-time, but… “Yeah,” he repeated, and slid backwards towards the head of the bed._

_Remus watched him, a strange look in his eyes. “Are you sure you –”_

_“I trust you,” Sirius cut him off again, voice low._

_Remus said nothing, but held Sirius’s eyes as he crawled forward until he was straddling Sirius’s legs once more._

_Sirius lifted his arms above his head, grey eyes still locked with amber._

_Slowly Remus slid the unknotted tie from his neck, letting the ends trail across Sirius’s chest as he moved towards his wrists._

_Sirius shivered at the tickle of silk on his skin, then shivered again as Remus bound his wrists together then knotted the end of the tie to the headboard._

_Remus pulled back for a moment and just looked at Sirius. “Beautiful,” he murmured softly. “You’re beautiful.”_

_Sirius felt his cheeks heat up, but before he could say anything, Remus was kissing him again, and he forgot how to speak._

_Hot lips traced a path down Sirius’s throat and he moaned, arching into the touch. Scorching kisses trailed across Sirius’s chest, pausing briefly to taunt one nipple, then the other before dipping lower._

_Delicate fingers made quick work of Sirius’s belt, and by now Sirius was positively writhing under the brunet’s touch, already-incoherent mumblings falling from his lips._

_The tip of Remus’s tongue darted quickly into Sirius’s navel before –_

BANG!

Sirius jerked upright with a start, nearly cracking his head on the bedpost. “Whafck?” he demanded, glaring blearily about the room.

Peter, standing barely a foot from the offending door, cringed. “Sorry,” he apologized, face bright red. “Didn’t realize you were asleep.”

Sirius scowled, and shifted uncomfortably on his bed.

“I saw James go out a bit ago,” Peter went on, babbling slightly with nerves. “He was alone, so I figured he’d just gone to the kitchens…” he trailed off, anxiously transferring his weight from one foot to the other and back again.

Sirius rubbed his face, trying to keep from snapping at the awkward boy. It wasn’t like it was _his_ fault he’d interrupted… and then Sirius’s conversation with James came rushing back. His head snapped up. “James went out?” he demanded.

“Er, yes,” Peter cringed some more under Sirius’s scrutiny. “He left a bit ago…”

They both heard the footsteps on the stairs mere moments before the door opened.

Peter jumped aside just in time to avoid being hit as James entered, clearly trying not to make any noise.

Peter and Sirius both stared at the Head Boy.

“Oh,” James grinned wryly, and let the door swing shut with a _bang_ only slightly less canon-like than Peter’s. “You’re awake.”

Sirius frowned at him. “Yes. Thanks to Peter and the Thunder Door.”

James raised an eyebrow at Peter – who gave him a painful looking smile – before turning back to Sirius. “It is a rather loud door,” he conceded.

“Thank you, Professor,” Sirius snapped.

Both eyebrows went up this time. “Professor?” he inquired.

Sirius stared at him in shock for a long moment, then narrowed his eyes. “Where did you go?” he asked, suspiciously.

“Head Boy things,” James replied vaguely and moved towards his trunk, pulling out his pajamas. “Pete, do you want the bathroom first?” he asked, turning back to the smaller boy.

“Yeah, sure,” Peter mumbled, and hastily gathered his things from his own trunk before disappearing into the bathroom, shooting a last quick ‘I’m sorry’ glance at Sirius before the door closed.

“James.” Sirius felt tense and wary as he bit out the words. “Where did you go?”

James avoided looking at Sirius as he changed out of his robes, getting ready for bed.

“James.”

Finally James turned. “You know where I went.”

_Fuck._ “James, you didn’t.”

“Of course I did!” James snapped. “You’re like a brother to me, Sirius, and I… I didn’t know what else to do!”

“What _did_ you do?”

“Nothing! Well, I didn’t hit him or hex him, or anything. He’s a teacher. I’m not stupid. But, _damn_ , I wanted to.”

“James.”

“I just… talked to him. At him, I suppose.” James looked down, twisting his hands together awkwardly. “I just wanted him to know that I knew, and that you have friends. And I…” he trailed off. “Did you know he has pictures of you?”

Sirius started. “What?” He shook himself. “Yes. I bought a camera at the beginning of the summer, and we traded it back and forth. I have pictures of him as well. Did he _show_ you the pictures?”

James shook his head, flushing slightly. “It was an accident that I saw them. But, I meant… _pictures_. Not just pictures of you posing for him, or of the two of you together. Pictures of _you_. Asleep. You know. _Without clothes_.”

**TBC**


	9. Chapter 9

Sirius blinked, and felt the blood rise in his cheeks. “Oh. Oh. Well, I… I didn’t know he… But I guess that’s… After all _I_ have…”

James was staring.

Sirius winced. “Fair’s fair?” he offered.

“What?”

_I_ really _don’t want to talk about this,_ Sirius thought uncomfortably. _Not now._ “What was he doing with the pictures?” he asked instead.

“He had them in a box,” James replied, still looking a little suspicious, but apparently unwilling to press the subject at the moment. “I knocked it over.” He frowned suddenly, remembering. “Do you know anything about a mug?”

“A mug?” Sirius echoed.

“Yeah,” James nodded, still frowning. “A red mug with gold writing on it.”

_My mug._ “He had it?” Sirius asked, kneeling up on the bed.

James’s frown deepened. “Yes. He was –”

“Was he using it?” demanded Sirius, cutting him off.

“No. It was in the box I knocked over. Why?”

Sirius smiled sadly. “It was mine,” he explained.

James opened his mouth, but Sirius held up a hand to stop him.

“Not really _mine_ ,” he amended. “But I got it for him. Gryffindor colors, you know. I couldn’t resist. It said, ‘Chocolate: the Miracle Cure’ on it. He was always eating chocolate. I gave it to him early on. A week or so after I started sleeping at his place, I think. Only he never used it, I did. I had my coffee in it every morning before sneaking back into the place my parents were leasing. He used the mug he got for me. Black with silver writing. ‘Guilty as Sin and twice as Hot.’” Sirius’s mouth twisted. “It’s in my trunk. With other stuff from the summer.”

The sound of water could be heard coming from the bathroom in the stillness that followed. Finally, James spoke.

“Your mug. It broke, when the box fell.”

Sirius’s eyes went wide. “It broke?” he whispered.

James nodded. “I fixed it,” he said quickly. “But the way he was behaving when it broke, it was as if it had been alive. He was, well… he didn’t even seem to remember he had a wand. It was, well,” he scowled, “if the man weren’t such a bastard, I would have felt rather sorry for him.”

“Don’t say that, James. He’s not a bad person.” Something shifted in Sirius’s mind. _If he was so upset about the mug, then maybe…_ he thought, and, _I wonder if…_

James was silent for a long moment, still frowning, then opened his mouth again, but the bathroom door opened before he could speak and Peter was back, hair slightly damp around his face from washing.

“Bathroom’s free,” he told James.

“Right,” the bespectacled boy nodded. “Thanks, Pete.” He looked quickly at Sirius again, but Sirius looked away.

“Night, then,” Peter said, sounding slightly awkward, clearly realising he had missed something, but unsure as to whether he should inquire.

“Night,” Sirius replied, then pulled the curtains firmly around his bed.

He heard James sigh on the other side of the curtains, before, “Night, Pete. Night Sirius.” A moment later the bathroom door closed then the sound of water running could be heard faintly from the other room.

Sirius crawled back under his covers. He reached under his pillow and pulled out the strip of silky cloth that was hidden beneath. He wound it around one of his hands and curled into a ball, wrapping his arms around himself. He closed his eyes tightly. Silk covered hand pressed to his cheek, he drifted back to sleep.

– – – – –

Thursday morning, Sirius woke early, showered, and dressed before his roommates rose. He grabbed his schoolbag and slipped out of the dorm, shutting the door carefully to make sure it didn’t slam.

The halls were deserted at that hour, so quiet they echoed.

Several minutes later, he rapped his knuckles lightly on a heavy wooden door. There was no reply.

Sirius drew his wand, took a deep breath, and tapped the doorknob, unlocking the door. He opened it hesitantly, taking care that it wouldn’t creak, and slid inside as soon as the crack was wide enough.

Seconds later, he stood next to Remus’s bed, looking down at the sleeping brunet. Unable to stop himself, he knelt beside the bed, careful not to make any noise as he set his bag down, leaned over, and gently brushed the hair away from the closed eyes.

The older man stirred, and his eyelids fluttered for a moment before opening. He blinked blearily at Sirius in the dim light. “What’re you doing up?” he murmured, voice slightly raspy from sleep. He caught Sirius’s hand and tugged. “Come back to bed.”

Sirius opened his mouth – to say what, he wasn’t sure – but the sudden widening of amber eyes forestalled anything he might have said in any case.

Remus sat up abruptly, much more alert than he had been mere seconds before. “How did you get in here?” he demanded. His hand was still holding Sirius’s, but his grip had tightened almost painfully.

“I – the door –” Sirius tried to explain.

“What do you think you’re doing?” Remus hissed, cutting him off. “You can’t just –”

“Stop it,” Sirius said firmly, covering Remus’s mouth with his free hand. “Just _stop_.”

Remus stared, eyes startled over Sirius’s hand.

“Look, I just – will you just – will you just listen to me for a minute?” Sirius asked.

What felt like a year passed before Remus nodded, releasing his finger-crushing clutch.

Sirius lowered his hand, but suddenly couldn’t think what to say.

Remus waited, watching him in silence.

At last, Sirius sighed. “Look, Rem, I just…” and all at once he lost his nerve. “I just wanted to apologise for James.”

Remus blinked several times in quick succession, looking a little shocked, as though he’d expected something else.

“He told me he came to see you last night,” Sirius went on, eyes fixed on his hands. “I don’t know exactly what he said, but I just wanted to say I didn’t know, and I wouldn’t have asked him to. So… I’m sorry.”

Neither of them spoke for a long moment.

“Don’t be sorry,” Remus said at last. “You’re lucky to have such a good friend.” His voice was oddly tight. “Good friends are rare.” He was quiet for another moment, then, “He did tell me that you didn’t know.”

Sirius twisted his fingers uncomfortably in his lap. “I didn’t think he’d do anything like that.”

“Yes, well. What did you expect when you told him?” Remus’s voice was still tight, and the undertone was more than a little accusatory.

That made Sirius look up. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

Remus scowled, and, for some reason, it reminded Sirius of Regulus when he hadn’t gotten his way. “Exactly what I said,” he snapped.

Sirius blinked. “You’re upset that I told him about us?” it was only half question.

“I merely wasn’t prepared to be set upon for something I wasn’t aware we were telling the general public.”

Sirius gaped. “I didn’t tell the general public! I told James.”

“And who else?” Remus half-snarled.

“What?”

“Who else did you tell?” Remus demanded.

“No one!” Sirius snapped, surprised by this sudden change in the usually amiable man. “I only told James. No one else even knows about me. You _know_ that.”

“And who else did _James_ tell?” Remus wanted to know.

“No one!” Sirius repeated, starting to get angry. He jumped to his feet, frowning down at the brunet. “He wouldn’t tell anyone without my permission, and he _knows_ I don’t want people to know. Even if you _weren’t_ our teacher.”

Remus stood, and the distance between them was suddenly much less. He was seemingly completely unaware that he was only wearing pajama bottoms, but at that distance, Sirius could feel the heat radiating off the other man and had to fight the sudden temptation to close the distance between them entirely, even angry as he was.

“How can you be so sure?” Remus insisted.

“Why are you so against him knowing?” Sirius demanded. “You must have known I would tell him. I tell him everything. He’s my best friend.”

“Is that all?”

Sirius gasped at the nastiness of the question. “ _What_?”

“Is that all he is to you?”

Sirius’s mouth moved, but he couldn’t make any sound come out. _What is_ wrong _with him?_ he wondered. _He was never like this over the summer._ “Meaning _what_ , exactly?”

“Meaning he came charging down here like he wanted to be your white knight in shining armor, _exactly_.”

“That’s so unfair,” Sirius whispered, shocked by the attack, irritated by the interrogation, and starting to feel intensely confused. “He was just looking after me.”

“That’s all it was? Looking after you? You’re sure there’s nothing more?”

“No, there’s nothing more. He’s like a brother to me, more of a brother than Regulus.” Sirius was getting more and more upset as he got more and more confused. “I love him as much as I love Regulus, and he loves me.”

“You love him?” Remus repeated, sounding vaguely as though he’d been punched, but still quite angry.

“Of course,” Sirius bit out, still not sure what the point of all this was. _I thought he didn’t care, but the way he’s acting…_

“He loves you?”

“Yes, I told you that already.” _It’s almost as if he’s…_ “Are you _jealous_?” he asked, barely believing it himself, but what else…

“ _No_.”

“You certainly sound like you are,” Sirius couldn’t help snapping.

“I am _not_ jealous,” the brunet hissed.

“Then why do you care?” Sirius challenged, not sure he really wanted to know the answer, not sure he could handle it, everything had already gotten so far out of hand, he hadn’t come here to argue, after all, he’d come hoping maybe the other man’s reaction to the broken mug had meant something, and to – but…

“Because I love you!” Remus burst out, then, looking horrified, clapped a hand to his mouth.

**TBC**


	10. Chapter 10

Sirius’s jaw dropped and he could only stare for a long moment at the brunet standing mere inches away from him, hand still tight over his mouth, looking terrified.

“You… you what?” Sirius breathed when he could finally speak.

Remus only shook his head, amber eyes wide and frightened.

“You… you love me?” Sirius asked, voice soft, barely believing it.

Remus shook his head again, but it wasn’t denial.

“Remus?”

The shorter man continued to shake his head. After several long seconds he muttered something unintelligible.

Sirius reached out and gently pulled Remus’s hand away from his mouth. “What?”

“I can’t.”

“Can’t what? Can’t tell me?”

The older man’s eyes were over-bright. “Can’t love you.”

Sirius stepped back, feeling as though he’d been punched. “What?”

“I’m – I’m your teacher,” Remus’s voice was rather desperate.

Something snapped. “I don’t _fucking care_ if you’re my teacher!” Sirius screamed.

“Sirius, please, your voice –”

“It doesn’t _matter_!”

“Sirius, please lower –”

“ _Don’t_ tell me to lower my voice!” the black-haired man snarled, but then he stopped and took several deep breaths. “You’re still you,” he said at last, much more softly. “The man I met in Paris and became friends with. The man I fell in love with.”

“Sirius.”

“Remus. Please.” He took a step forward, reached out – only slightly hesitantly – and lightly traced the brunet’s bottom lip with the pad of his thumb.

Remus’s chin tilted slightly, moving into the touch as if of its own volition. His lips parted slightly.

“Tell me,” Sirius’s voice had dropped lower and was slightly scratchy. His fingers traveled downwards, caressing the soft neck. “Tell me the truth, Remus.”

“Hm?” it was half inquiry, half moan.

Sirius took a deep, steadying breath. “Do you love me?”

Remus jerked back, almost falling backwards onto his bed, but caught himself in time.

“Don’t say you’re my teacher. Don’t say I’m too young. No excuses or reasons why you can’t or why you shouldn’t. Just tell me… the truth.”

“Don’t do this to me, Sirius,” Remus whispered.

“Please, Remus. I need…” Sirius stopped and took another breath. “Do you love me?”

Amber eyes met grey for a long moment.

Sirius could feel his heart pounding in his chest as though it were trying to beat its way through his ribs.

Finally, after what felt to Sirius like a century, Remus nodded. “Yes,” he said softly. “Yes. I shouldn’t. I shouldn’t, but I do.”

The breath Sirius hadn’t realised he’d been holding fell out in a rush of relief. He lurched forward, arms twining around the other man, burying his face in the bare shoulder. “I love you so much,” he whispered against the skin.

“Sirius,” Remus’s tone was very nearly broken.

“So much,” Sirius repeated.

Remus pulled himself loose and sat on the edge of his bed, staring at his feet. “This doesn’t change anything, Sirius.”

“It changes _everything_ ,” Sirius countered.

“No. I’m still your teacher.”

“Only until the end of the year,” Sirius reminded him. “We can be careful that long.”

“We’ve talked about this already.” Remus wouldn’t look up.

“But now it’s _different_ ,” Sirius insisted. He slid his fingers under Remus’s chin and forced the other man to meet his eyes.

“How is it different?” Remus wanted to know. His eyes were over-bright again.

“Because this isn’t just about fooling around. Or a summer fling,” Sirius explained. “And we both know that now. And we both know that we both know.” He tried to grin, but his stomach was in knots.

“You have no idea what you’re asking.”

“I’m asking for you,” Sirius whispered.

“There’s more to it than that,” Remus replied, voice equally soft.

“But you’re all that matters.”

“Sirius.”

“Remus.”

The brunet bit his lip.

Sirius leant down and brushed his lips lightly across the other man’s forehead before pulling back just far enough to meet his amber eyes again. “Please,” he said. He seemed to be saying that a lot, lately, but he couldn’t help it. He’d fall on his knees if it would help.

Remus bit harder into his lip for a moment, then seemed to come to a decision. “You’re right,” he said.

Sirius’s eyes widened.

Remus reached up to take Sirius’s hands. He pulled the younger man to sit next to him. “Look,” he began, “This is foolish. No,” he shook his head when Sirius opened his mouth. “Don’t say anything until I’ve finished. This, between us, is foolish and shouldn’t have happened to begin with. But it happened. It’s happening. And, foolish as it is, I can’t seem to want it to stop.”

“Remus –”

“Wait, Sirius.” The smaller man squeezed the hands he held. “This doesn’t mean that I think it’s right. I’m still your teacher. I know I wasn’t last summer, but the summer is over, and now I am. I don’t want to lose you, but you don’t know what the consequences could be if we were caught.”

“I know –”

“Wait,” the brunet repeated. “Let me finish. You graduate at the end of the year. I won’t be your teacher anymore. We’ll wait until then.”

“We’ll wait?” Sirius asked. “What do you mean, we’ll wait?”

Remus chewed his lower lip for a moment before speaking. “We’ll be on a break,” he said finally. “Not _together_ in the strictest sense of the word, but… on a break.”

“No.” Sirius shook his head. “I don’t want to be _on a break_. I want to be with you. I can’t not see you, or talk to you. I can’t sit in your class and pretend you’re just a teacher until the end of the year.”

Remus sighed. “Sirius, you don’t understand.”

“I want to be able to see you outside of class,” Sirius insisted. “I want to be able to talk to you and kiss you and –”

“No, Sirius.”

“Remus.”

Remus worried his lip again. “All right,” he relented. “We’ll be… friends. All right? We’ll say… we’ll say I’m tutoring you. Teaching you more advanced defense. Minerva said you have ambitions to be an auror. We can use that as an excuse. You can come to my office. I can teach you and help you prepare to be an auror, and we can also sit and talk. Like friends. But that’s it.”

“Remus.”

“Until you graduate.”

“Remus.”

“Please don’t fight me on this, Sirius.”

“I just want –”

“I know.” Remus sighed. “I don’t like this, either, but this is the way it has to be.”

“No, it doesn’t.” Sirius leaned in closer. “We’ll be alone. No one will suspect anything. We can do whatever we want.”

“Sirius.”

Sirius’s tongue darted out to touch the much-gnawed lip. “We’re alone now,” he whispered, freeing one of his hands to caress the other man’s bare chest. The responding shiver made him grin, and he freed his other hand to wind it in light brown tresses, tugging the other man forward for a kiss.

Remus’s arms slid around the taller man and they tumbled together onto their sides before rolling slightly until Sirius was on top of the brunet.

The grey-eyed Black hummed happily into the kiss.

But a moment later, Remus was pulling away again. “No, Sirius. Mm. Stop. No, stop.”

Sirius propped himself up on his hands, but refused to relinquish his position. “What?”

“This,” Remus told him. “This is exactly what we can’t do.”

“But you –”

“No, Sirius.” Remus planted his hands firmly on Sirius’s chest and pushed until the younger man rolled off of him. “And now you look like you’ve slept in your clothes.”

“I’d rather _not_ sleep, _out_ of them,” Sirius grumbled, but sat up and tried his best to straighten his uniform.

Remus smiled wryly. “You should really go,” he said. “Breakfast. And I have to get ready for my class.”

Sirius sighed. _He’s right. James and Peter will wonder what’s happened to me. Speaking of James… No. I don’t want to bring that up again just now. Later, when we have some time to talk… Or if he decides to be stubborn about this ‘on a break’ idea._ “I’ll see you soon?”

Remus’s mouth twisted. “I hardly dare wonder what you’ll do if I don’t.”

Sirius blinked. _Can he read my…? No._

“I’ve heard more stories from my colleagues since I’ve been here about you and your friends than you ever told me over the summer.”

Sirius felt his cheeks grow hot. “Oh. Right. Well.” He tried to grin and hoped it didn’t look too painful.

Remus laughed. “I’ll talk to Minerva today about your… auror training.”

Sirius’s grin was a lot easier now. “Great.” He rose, running his hands through his hair. “Presentable?” he asked.

Remus stared for a moment, then quickly nodded. “More than.”

Sirius smirked and bent to pick up his bag. When he straightened, Remus was staring again. “I’ll see you, then,” he said pointedly.

Remus shook himself and stood. “Right,” he said, cheeks flushed, as he followed Sirius to the door.

“‘Til then,” Sirius grinned, and reached for the knob.

Remus stopped him. “Sirius, tell me something.” He sounded curious.

Sirius turned. “Yes?”

“What did you really come here for?”

Sirius felt his cheeks heat up slightly once more, but he grinned as he reached into his bag, deciding _part_ of the truth might cause an _interesting_ reaction. “I had something I was going to return to you.”

“Oh?” Remus quirked an eyebrow. “What?”

“This,” Sirius replied, pulling it from his bag.

Amber eyes went wide.

**TBC**


End file.
